Ask Frank: Fast Food Edition

Hey Frank - What kind of fast food restaurants do you like?

The only fast food restaurant I frequent these days is 5 guys. If you've never heard about 5 guys you better ask somebody - It's wicked. In comparison no other fast food seems palatable... A 5 guys burger can raise the dead from the grave.

Over the years I've had the opportunity to review many fast food spots. Here's the first part of my list of joints to skip

Taco Bell - Also known as "Taco Hell" (where evil tacos go once they've passed on). The menu consists of North American adapted or bastardized "mexican" food. This shit is real bad and has constantly gotten worse over the years. Somebody please get this message to the corporate heads - topping mystery meat with sour cream and salsa then wrapping it in a tortilla does not make it tasty. I recently read that the meat content is actually only 35% beef - the rest is fillers. No wonder my stomach checks out whenever I eat there. According to the internets the taco bell chihuahua "gidget" died in 2009 of a stroke. I'm sure it's related to the food she endorsed...
True story - I once went to the drive through and the idiot at the microphone actually asked me "for here or to go". Insert your own diarrhea joke here. The only requirements for employees of taco bell is they posses a lack of self respect and brain power.

Long John Silver - (Warning * may cause rectal injuries) my boy wattson and I were driving from orlando back to montreal a few years ago and stopped at this trash bin of a restaurant in virginia. Their "specialty" is battered marine animal (battered fish, battered shrimp, etc), battered chicken, and after eating there I have to add battered stomach to the list. We had to stop at almost every rest stop between virginia and montreal so he could batter the toilets (add this to the battered items list). At one point I seriously thought I was going to have to take him to the E.R. This was the first "shitting across america" roadtrip incident.

*EDIT - I think the place is run by pirates.

^Wattson^

McDonalds - Large contributor to the american obesity juggernaut and needs no description. The food has the most acrid aftertaste - In fact I imagine it's what an infected vagina must taste like. My boy Finger claims everytime he goes there he leaves satisfied... I'm positive he doesn't even eat the food and just frequents the McGloryhole in the McBathroom.

^Ronald McDonald bugging out when you don't eat his food^

BP gas station - Finger and his girl decided to buy pizza from after we stopped off for gas in south carolina on our way to florida. Who eats gas station pizza?????????? Let alone at 3 am? To top things off they are both lactose intolerant and we still had 8 hours of driving left... FML.

Waffle house - Shitty breakfast food served up hot and gross. I ate there once and before even eating my meal I decided it wasn't for me. Incidentally the waffle house came complete with the obligatory burned out letter in their sign. This one said "affle house". How appropriate.

Tiki Ming - North American adapted Chinese fast food. The last time I ate there the girl at the cash looked exactly like kung fu panda (probably smelled like him too). I ordered chow mein and I got boiled cabbage bullshit! Everything on my plate tasted like the color brown doused in salt. After I had to lie down because it felt like the food was digesting ME.

I'm pretty sure I tasted death that day...

Roy Rogers - Hamburger/fries joint with greasy pre cooked food. When I got my food it looked like they gave me a paper bag of hot trash. Don't eat there unless you have a cast iron stomach. Plus the employees smell like horses.

Arby's - Blech! <----- Puke noise. Nuff' said.

KFC - Fried chicken in various forms. KFC used to be the bomb back in the day (remember toonie tuesdays???) but now it's just 11 herbs and spices, 5 kinds of dirt, foot stirred batter, more dirt, 2 kinds of rooster ejaculat, that pinkish grease from Ghostbusters 2, beaks and chicken. And now they have this double down sandwich??? Bacon and cheese sandwiched between two pieces of fried chicken - 540 calories, 30 grams of fat and 1,740 milligrams of sodium. That's fucked up. And yet my boy prez still wants to try it. Yeah ok buddy see you in the emergency room!

Kentucky Fried Caca.

Stay tuned for more restaurant bashing.



Frank Breaker

Ask Frank

I'm back! How about a round of applause for my guest blogger mr. Ron Burgundy!

On to the business at hand...

Hey Frank - Why does my mom always screw up the punchline of every joke?

Because she's probably dumb. My mom screws up jokes too. Here's the last one she told me

My mom: "Haha I heard a good joke on the radio about the different types of sex. They are newlywed sex, um... hallway sex and courtroom sex. Newly wed sex is when you're new to your relationship and have sex whenever you can. Speaking of newlyweds did you know that your cousin andrew go married 2 months ago? He married the girl and he only knew for 4 months! Between you me and the wall I don't think that marriage is going to work out. According to your auntie his wife is only after his money then we both laughed because he has none... Oh yes the joke. Where was I? Oh yes hallway sex. Hallway sex is when you and your spouse pass in the hallway and you tell each other "screw you!" Hahahaha. Will you remind me to tell dad that the hallway light is still burnt out? Can you believe this? 2 weeks and he hasn't changed it. I swear the man does it to me on purpose... And don't even get me started on the toilet in the downstairs bathroom! It runs all the time! You would think he'd notice since he's always sitting on it. Maybe he needs more fiber? Don't blueberries have a lot of fiber? I could pick blueberries of the bush in the backyard for him to eat with cereal in the morning instead of his poached eggs and toast. He eats too many damn eggs! That's probably why he can't push his stuff out easily. I always hear him grunting away and 15 minutes later he comes out of the toilet with sweat on his forehead and his car magazine under his arm... Oh yes and last there's courtroom sex where your spouse and their lawyer screw you out of every dime you have.

I was stuck in a car with her when she told me this one. Longest 1/2 hour of my life.

Hey Frank - Is it alright to have leftover cake for breakfast?

Sure willy wonka. Why don't you wash it down with a slice of pie too?

Hey Frank - I work as a waitress in a restaurant. How do I get better tips? I've tried everything I can think of...

Tell your boss the client tipped you 100% on the meal but skipped him paying the food. It's bound to work at least one time...

Hey Frank - What's better gay people or religious people?

Gay people of course. They win - religious people are boring as shit.

Hey Frank - I'm a dude - Is it wrong for me to run from bees even though I'm not allergic?

There's nothing wrong with men running from bees even if they aren't allergic! I mean I'm not allergic to bullets but believe you me I'll take it up to 88mph and book it if I hear a gunshot.

Hey Frank - How many homes were destroyed by hurricane katrina?

http://www.blogger.com/www.google.com

Hey Frank - What kind of interesting fish live in australia?

Sharks and shrimps.

Hey Frank - Why does my car's engine still run after I removed the key?

Cause its a piece of garbage. Throw it in the trash.

Hey Frank - How do you clean tarnished jewelery

I know a guy. Send all your jewelery to me. I'll return it to you within 5 business days.

Trust me.

Hey Frank - What were the first colonies in the USA?

Nebraska, Nebulon, Salvador, Coruscant, Deadman's Cay, New York, Utah, and Mars.

Hey Frank - What do people in the middle east eat for dessert?

Fried sand. With honey.

Hey Frank - How many albums did diana ross sell?

Billions. She's badass.

(This one was asked by my girl) Hey Frank - My boyfriend says you can make a wish with a pubic hair just like with an eyelash. Is that true?

Yes. Wish away my little shining star!

Frank Breaker

Ask Frank (guest written by the great Ron Burgundy)

I'm Ron Burgundy (as if you didn't know). Frank Breaker couldnt be here today so he asked me to guest write his advice column today. So loosen your tie, grab a scotch and enjoy.

Hey Frank Ron - I've been having problems maintaining my erection during intercourse with the missus. I've been contemplating cialis or viagra but I'm afraid of the serious side effect of temporary blindness and hearing loss. What should I do?

Blindness and hearing loss????????? Christ how big does that stuff make your penis that you're poking out eyes and ears? Personally I don't need help in that "area" if you know what I mean. I'm a man that maintains erections that have the strength of steel and iron. That's what kind of man I am. Your penis is made out of paper towel.

Hey Frank Ron - I read in cosmo that one of the best “hot spots” to grab the man of your dreams is the applestore. Is this true?

This question is stupid. You sound fat.

Edit: I actually like bigger ladies. Give me a call 439 0116

PS: Cosmopolitan is for hookers and idiots.

Hey Frank Ron - Should I become a vegetarian? I've heard it's the best way to reduce one's carbon footprint. I really care about the environment.

If you become a vegetarian you will be eating the environment. Rather than cutting down trees for your nourishment have a steak instead. I love steak. I'm eating one right now. Steaky, steak, steak. Here it goes down, down into my belly...

Hey Frank Ron - My boyfriend's penis smells bad. How do I tell him without him getting upset?

Don't tell him just dust it with air freshener. Or buy febreeze condoms. If they don't exist I'm putting a patent on them right now.

Hey Frank Ron - By chance would you happen to know who invented Fahrenheit?

Fahrenheit sometimes spelled "farrenhite" was invented in 1893 by the the Scottish architect and scholar Ivo Shandor. He was also a doctor. And the inventor of scotch. You know all of this is true because the last time I looked in the dictionary, my name was Ron Burgundy.

Hey Frank Ron - What makes a castle unique?

The type of moat monster it has on payroll.

Hey Frank Ron - Do you want to do more or less repetitions and sets for muscle gain?

If you want to be buff like me then you do not hesitate to do it all. Once you reach my level you can sell tickets to the gun show with confidence.

Hey Frank Ron - How big is 320 gb

Huge. As big as North Dakota. At least.

Hey Frank Ron - Are hickies fun?

Only when they are on your penis.

Hey Frank Ron - I lost my car keys. What should I do?

You should "lose" your car too. I know a guy - call me 439 0116

Hey Frank Ron - What does "cultural exchange" mean?

Cultural exchange is when you have sex with a foreigner like an Asian chick.

Hey Frank Ron - Who did Marie Curie's daughter marry?

Irène Curie is my grandmother and the source of my incredible brain power. She married my grandfather Horatio Larjesse Burgundy at the pristine Chapel of Love in Bloomington, Minnesota. Oh what a glorious ceremony it was! There were flowers, cake and men dressed in the finest trousers and sports coats.

Stay classy Montreal

Ron Burgundy

Ask Frank

Hey Frank - I just changed the toilet paper roll in my bathroom. Why after my girl goes to the toilet is there only 20% left of the roll? What do they do in there?

Mans aren't supposed to know the answer to this one but I did a little recon (i.e hid in the shower) and watched what my girl does. She rips it in pieces and eats it! Trust me your girl does the same...

Hey Frank - Why do girls pace back and forth while they're on the phone?

It's because of their vaginas. I don't know the exact science but it has something to do with the sound waves coming from the device interfering with the electromagnetic radiation that is emitted from the pussy (much like an airplanes navigational instruments being adversely affected by cell phones). They have to keep their vaginas in motion to stave off the electromagnetic discharge... I believe this is based on the perpetual movement technology rolex developed for self winding watches. Mens use the same technique whenever they run the microwave.

Hey Frank - Why do trannies dress so slutty?

Have you ever seen a tranny dressed like a housewife??? No. You know why? Because they are all tramps. And mean.

Hey Frank - I like the idea of being in law enforcement. Should I become a security guard?

If you become a security guard you are not in law enforcement so the dream is already over for you. You have no gun. All you do is observe and report. Basically you are a witness who gets paid for his time. Good luck with all that

Hey Frank - Who is the vice president?

Of what? Of your country?? I'm canadian which basically means I don't care.

Hey Frank - Can I mix bleach and water together to make it less toxic?

Personally I prefer to drink my bleach straight. That way you get the full bodied flavor in every sip.

Hey Frank - My girlfriend wants us to swim with the dolphins. Is it safe?

Sure! Dolphines are just gay sharks and don't worry they're vegetarians so they won't nibble at your testicles.

Hey Frank - Do canadians really ride polar bears to work? If so where do I rent one?

Yes and it kicks ass! Mine likes chill in the parking lot with the other polar bears smoking cigarettes and shooting the shit while he waits for me. Then he tells me all about his day on the ride home. His name is carlos and he's originally from the dominican republic. Contact me when you get here I'll hook you up with his cousin fernando.

Hey Frank - Which direction is north in canada?

Step 1 - face south
Step 2 - turn 45 degrees counter clockwise.
Step 3 - repeat step 2

Hey Frank - Why do toasters always have a setting on them which burns your toast so badly you can't eat it?

This setting isn't for toast it's for tanning your hands.

Hey Frank - What are male ballerinas called?

Women.

Hey Frank - What is baby oil made from?

Distilled petroleum byproducts and babies.

Frank Breaker

Ask Frank

Hey Frank - I dropped my Iphone in the toilet and it smells like poo now. What should I do?

Go to the app store and download the app “IStink”. It’s free.

Hey Frank – I’ve been single for a year now cause I can’t find the right woman. Should I continue looking for my soul mate?

Fuck it let her come look for you. Or try men.

Hey Frank - Do you frequent strip clubs?

Not that often. I don’t particularly relish the idea of sitting around a room full of strange dudes with boners...

Hey Frank - What’s worse: texting and driving or drinking and driving?

Texting and driving is unquestionably worse. At least with drinking and driving you’re at the wheel watching trying to watch the road. When you’re texting and driving no one’s watching the road - you might as well just get in the back seat. I almost drove into a ditch texting my girl the other day. Imagine I crashed my ride?! My last text would’ve been “I'm having buffalo wings tonight BUFFALO!!!”. That’s fucked up

Hey Frank - My girlfriend gave a mock blowjob to an icicle last year at a new years party and really went at it with gusto. How do I get her to do the same moves on me?

Put your wiener in the freezer. Leave it on ice for about 30 minutes (bring a magazine to read while you wait) then show your frozen dick to your girlfriend. Instant blowjay my friend

Hey Frank - Why is my grandpa mean to some people?

Old people just don’t give a fuck. My 77 year old uncle once walked out of a hotel without paying his bill because he “didn’t feel like paying it”. He had been there for 2 weeks. And it wasn’t about the money dude is rich as fuck… I remember once instead of buying new shoes he painted his black dress shoes white to go with his white suit. I asked him what he was going to wear with his other suits – he said “I’m just going to have to paint the shoes black again”. Cheap bastard.

Hey Frank - Why did my parents have me circumcised? I’m not Jewish.

Because you parents wanted you to look just like your dad. Next time you’re with your dad ask him to show you his dick for comparison and you show him yours.

Hey Frank - I’m in love with my cousin and she likes me. What should I do?

Go ahead and plow her bareback. If she doesn’t get pregnant then it’s meant to be. If she does get pregnant donate the baby to a carnival.

Hey Frank - I cut my boyfriend with a kitchen knife on purpose. Should I apologize? I kind of feel bad…

Don’t even worry about it. The mere fact that you feel bad is good enough for me.

Hey Frank - Why doesn’t the moon fall down?

Because it’s glued on real good.

Hey Frank - I accidentally swallowed a bee. What should I do?

Get someone to perform the Heimlich maneuver on you pronto before it lays a hive in your pancreas.

Hey Frank - My sock went missing when I put it in the washing machine. Where did it go?

It was digested by your washing machine. It was probably starving - they need sustenance and their favorite seems to be socks... I feed mine a bowl of yarn every night so he leaves my socks alone. His name is karl. He's german.

Frank Breaker

Potential winner of the 2011 Artificial Vagina Worst Video of Life Award

I can't even comment on how much of a disaster this is. Just press play



I'm howling over here hahahahahaaaaa!!! Video fail.

Frank Breaker

Edit: I think I know this guy!

Ask Frank

Hey Frank - I hate my past how can i change it?

I could take you back in time with my 85 Fiero Gt Time Machine for $2199.99 + tax. Just note - you only get 2 hours MAXIMUM in the past. I use the AIS rule (ass in seat) if your ass is not in the passenger seat within those 2 hours I will leave your stupid face in the past. I'm very busy I don't have time for shenanigans.

Hey Frank - Should I take the plastic off of my furniture?

Yes. Plastic on furniture is for immigrants fresh off the boat and people who host orgies.

Hey Frank - How can I become a doctor without going to school?

I'm sure you can learn all you need to know off the internet.

Hey Frank - I’ve had my cats for years but my new gf is allergic and she wants me to get rid of them. What should I do?

Hm... this is a tough one. Depends. How big are her tits?

Hey Frank - I have crabs, what should I feed them?

Don't feed them! Let them die then stick some ice down your crotch to keep those suckers fresh.

Hey Frank - Yesterday I was chased by a swarm of bees. Is it because I ate some royal jelly supplement?

If you ate it straight out of the hive then yes.

Hey Frank - My co worker really smells bad. What should I do about it?

Spray them in the face with febreeze.

Hey Frank - Where can I buy green eggs and ham?

If you mean the book try amazon. If you mean the food try fantasy land.

Hey Frank - I'm looking for good songs to strip for my husband to. Do you have any suggestions?

Depends. How big are your tits?
If they're big: Brick house by the Commodores 36-24-36
If they're medium: I put a spell on you by Screamin Jay Hawkins
If they're small: Summertime by Janis Joplin

Hey Frank - How come when I talk to girls on dating sites none of them talk back?

Cause you're probably ugly. Sorry kiddo.

Hey Frank - Can antarctica fall off the globe?

YES! Make sure you stay north of the equator my friend. I once went to new zealand and when I was going to catch a taxi the cab itself fell off the world. I also lost my sunglasses.

Hey Frank - How do I make a blueberry smoothie without blueberries?

Use strawberries and a blue marker.

Hey Frank - Will my date be impressed if I take her to burger king and buy her a junior whopper?

Only if you buy 2 of them. If you spring for fries you might even get a blow jay on the bus on the way back.

Hey Frank - What is an appropriate gift to buy my african american friend for black friday? Do you think he'll appreciate a book or an audio cd?

Get him The Wire DVD set complete series. Happy holidays!

Frank Breaker

Even more ask frank

Hey Frank - How do I get my girlfriend to kiss me? We've been going out for 10 months and we still haven't kissed what should i do?

Depends. How big are her tits?

Hey Frank - How long can an open bottle of alfredo sauce last in the fridge?

Open it stupid. If it smells wrong then throw it in the trash.

Hey Frank - If your boat trailer collides with another boat trailer on the highway, is it necessary to call the Coast Guard?

Yes - you should call them asap.

Hey Frank - What's your best party spinach dip recipe?

1 - 16 ounce (or 500 ml) container sour cream 1 cup mayonnaise 1 package Knorr vegetable soup mix 1 package spinach 1 bottle of Elmer brand white glue 2 loaves of round sourdough bread or pumpernickel bread (pumpernickel is dark rye bread) or 1 of each Chop the spinach. Mix it with the other ingredients, except the bread, and refrigerate it to let the flavors meld together.

Hollow out one of the loaves of bread with a knife, cut the second loaf of bread into cubes for dipping. Place the hollowed out loaf of bread on a serving plate and fill with the dip.

Enjoy

Hey Frank - Is sending money through western union safe?

Yes! If you're still not sure we can test it out. Send me $100.00 and I'll send it back to you as soon as I receive it. Here's my contact info: Frank Breaker P.O box 261 5667 Rue Sherbrooke Ouest, Montreal, QC

Hey Frank - Should I put chicken in my ramen noodles?

Do they even sell chicken at 7-11 stores?

Hey Frank - I'm a virgin and I've heard if you don't use it you lose it. Is this true? Will my vagina seal up on its own?

Yes it will it's only a matter of time. You need to get out there and plow the first dude you see. A vagina is very hard to reopen once it's sealed itself up.

Hey Frank - I swallowed one of my girlfriend's birth control by accident. What could happen?

Oral hormonal contraceptive pills have the adverse affect on men - you might already be pregnant. I suggest you see a doctor immediately for termination options.

Hey Frank - Do snots have calories?

Yes they are also very high in sodium.

Hey Frank - Whos this Justin Beavers I keep hearing about?

He's the retired guy who lives next door to me. You want to meet him? I can arrange it.

Hey Frank - My 12 year old daughter discovered masturbation and now she does all the time. She uses fruits and vegetables - carrots, cucumbers and bananas. How do I stop her?

Stop buying carrots, cucumbers and bananas. That way she won't be able to plow your supper anymore.

Hey Frank - How do I get my pregnant wife to let me breastfeed?

Depends. How big are her tits?

Frank Breaker

More Ask Frank

Hey Frank - I think my boyfriend might be in the closet. All 3 times we had sex I noticed his eyes were always closed. How can I tell if he is a gay? Is there a test?

Yes there is. You will need to build an electromagnet pronto! You need:

• A large iron nail (about 3 inches)
• About 3 feet of THIN COATED copper wire
• A fresh D size battery
• Some paper clips or other small magnetic objects

Here’s what you do:

1. Leave about 8 inches of wire loose at one end and wrap most of the rest of the wire around the nail. Try not to overlap the wires.

2. Cut the wire (if needed) so that there is about another 8 inches loose at the other end too.

3. Now remove about an inch of the plastic coating from both ends of the wire and attach the one wire to one end of a battery and the other wire to the other end of the battery. See picture below. (It is best to tape the wires to the battery - be careful though, the wire could get very hot!)

4. Now you have an ELECTROMAGNET! Put the point of the nail near a few paper clips and it should pick them up!

Now look at your boyfriend and check his reaction. If he’s busy sucking penis then he’s gay.

Hey Frank – Why do cheap sunglasses last forever?

The rule is sunglasses under $10.00 (CAD) never get lost. This fact is a universal physical constant. I tested it out myself – I bought some sunglasses from the dollar store, drove to the Old Port (montreal) and hurled them into the st laurent river. A couple days later I opened my sock drawer and there they were.

Hey Frank – I made jesus shaped cookies and ate them all last night. Does this mean I’ve received the body of Christ?

Sure.

HEY FRANK – I ACCIDENTLY TURNED ON CAPS LOCK ON THE KEYBOARD AT MY OFFICE. THE PROBLEM IS THE KEYBOARD IS FRENCH AND I’M ENGLISH SO I CAN’T UNDERSTAND THE KEYS. HOW DO I SWITCH THE CAPS LOCK OFF? I DON’T UNDERSTAND FRENCH

I HAVE THE EXACT SAME PROBLEM! I’VE LEARNED TO LIVE WITH IT – YOU SHOULD TOO.

Hey Frank - Are freckles contagious?

Of course they are! They are severe and permanent. For your own sake don’t go near any gingers lest you become one. I’ve heard they don’t have souls and only drink gingerale.

PS: they also have fire crotches.

Hey Frank - Is David blaine’s magic real?

Yes. He can really read minds so stop talking about him before he uses his psychic powers to assault us with mind bullets.

Hey Frank - My girl farted while having sex should I break up with her? Ordinarily I wouldn’t ask but it smelled like a dead skunk that crawled out of another skunk…

It depends. How big are her tits?

Hey Frank - what things did you do as a teenager that you covered up so well your dumb parents never figured out?

I used to stay out past my curfew and when it got really late I would call my house. My mom would answer and I’d say “its ok mommy I got it go back to bed.”

Frank Breaker

Leisure Diving

Move over planking here's the newest sensation - leisure diving. Its premise? Jumping into a pool, or other body of water while striking the most chill pose you possibly can. Some people do it in their bathing suits and some people take it up a notch and add accessories like costumes, martini shakers, ukuleles/guitars, crocket mallets, goose down pillows, copies of world war z, laptops, sombreros...

This shit looks wild! I guarantee it'll be bigger than the internet but it must hurt like a bitch. If you've ever done a belly flop you know that in those events somehow the water you're about to land on changes properties. It's like it picks up an extra atom or two and changes into pavement. When you watch it happen to someone else it's an epic event of awesomeness. When it happens to you it's just painful.

I think someone should do a leisure dive blowjob. But make sure to take your penis out of your girl's mouth before you land otherwise it's an awkward and painful trip to the emergency room for you.

Haar she blows!

Frank Breaker

Ask Frank

It's time for a new artificial vagina segment called "Ask Frank". Many of you have sent me dumb questions over the past couple years and I've decided to post the madness with my responses. Enjoy.

Hey Frank - why does frozen cauliflower taste so bad?

Because its frozen.

Hey Frank - I recently got a couple of nice, rather fabric cardigans, but I am not really sure what to wear under them. Do you have any suggestions?

I'd suggest wearing a shirt of some kind.

Hey Frank - I read your post about free condoms and thought maybe you were an authority on the subject. I am a virgin male and decided today that I wanted to figure out how condoms work. You know, for future reference. I have heard that it is important to "get the right size," so I’m wondering are the sizes listed on the box like they do bra sizes... kind of like, A, B, C, D?

There is regular size and magnum size. That’s it. Order a sampler pack from amazon and leave me alone.

PS stay away from durex brand.

Hey Frank - Are nuns aloud to masturbate?

Probably. But I’m sure they don’t do it “aloud” – everyone would hear the action.

Hey Frank - Why do shampoo instructions read, “Rinse and repeat”?

So that you use up more shampoo. Or maybe they think you missed your head the first time.

Hey Frank - What are the other 56 varieties of Heinz 57 sauce?

Ask heinz you bastard. CLICK

Hey Frank - Why is bra singular and panties plural?

I call it by its full designation - a pair of bra.

Hey Frank - Why does the Easter bunny hide eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.

The easter bunny probably plowed a chicken, got her pregnant and had to get rid of the evidence.

Hey Frank - Why is Charlie short for Charles if they are both the same number of letters?

Just use the name “chuck” and shutup.

Hey Frank - Why do we say something is out of whack? What is “whack”?

This question is whack.

Hey Frank - Why do they call the brand “Victoria's secret” Victoria's SECRET?

The secret is victoria used to be a dude named victor.

Hey Frank - I’ve read about your mom on your blog. What does she do for a living?

Shes a business owner. In her spare time she works as a tour guide on guilt trips…

Hey Frank - Which is larger, the Sun or the Earth.

You serious???

Hey Frank - Why is the chicken dance called the chicken dance?

What the fuck is the chicken dance?

Hey Frank - Why is deoderant spelled deoderant and not deoderent?

It isn’t. Its spelled “deodorant”.

Hey Frank - Why isn’t the word “colonel” spelled the way it sounds?

I wondered the very same thing a while ago. Probably to carry on the tradition of keeping the english language as perplexing as ever. Why is the word “bologna” pronounced bo lo nee?? I mean Lasagna isn’t pronounced la za nee…

That's it for now - feel free to send me more questions.

Frank Breaker

Get Him to the Greek - Sergio Roma Quotester

Frank Breaker

Office Space - Bill Lumbergh Quotester

Frank Breaker

Cop Out - Paul Hodges Quotester

Frank Breaker

Goodfellas - Tommy Devito Quotester

My new thing - combination Quotes and Poster. I call it a "Quotester"




Classic.

Frank Breaker