Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Alternative meat chock full of protein and magic

Someone sent me these photos today. So Unicorn meat is now an option? It wouldnt surprise me if this photo was taken at Espositos grocery store. Believe me that place is effing weird. They have the strangest selection of meats which might be interesting if the place didnt smell like ass. Anyways I wouldnt be surprised if theyre selling unicorn, I myself have been hunting them ever since I was old enough to hold a shotgun. The meat is surprisingly tasty! Its also healthy - in addition to being slimming it also gives excellent night vision, and the ability to see through objects. The only negative effects are the hallucinations and rainbow farts...

Heres a recipe my pops likes to make

Savory Unicorn Pot Roast and Vegetables Recipe
  • 1 unicorn roast (lean bottom blade, rump, etc. - grass fed if possible) about 3 to 4 pounds
  • 2 tablespoons walnut oil (can be substituted with olive oil)
  • 1 package dry onion soup mix
  • 1 cup water
  • 6 medium potatoes, peeled and quartered
  • 6 carrots, sliced in 2" pieces
  • 1/2 cup essence of rainbow

    In a large pan, brown unicorn roast in oil. Add onion soup mix, and 1 cup water. Cover and simmer for 2 hours, turning roast occasionally. Add potatoes and carrots. Cover and cook for another 40 minutes, or until vegetables are tender. Remove meat and vegetables to serving platter. Gradually stir the essence of rainbow into the sauce in pan, stirring until sauce boils and thickens. Dance a little jig in the corner until it's ready. Serve with thickened sauce over roast and potatoes. This recipe also goes nicely with a side leprechaun and magic mushroom demi-glace

For your information unicorn pot roast goes well with a nice bottle of Pinot Noir!

Frank Breaker

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