Tuesday, June 17, 2014

New segment - You might be ghetto:

New segment on the vag!

You might be ghetto:

If you use dishsoap as shampoo

If you change the letter s in some words to z's

If the batteries on your remote are held in with tape

If you have more than 3 uses for cocoa butter

If your skin looks like you work in a bakery (ashy as shit)

If you still wear drakkar noire

If you wear your sleep cap outside

If you put on panty hose instead of shaving your legs

If you add water to anything to "stretch it" (make it last longer) like ketchup/mustard, shampoo, dishsoap, etc)

If you pick your teeth with anything other than a toothpick or floss (business cards, string, etc)

If you clean your ears with anything other than a Q tip or cloth (bobby pin, key, etc)

If you like to get you hair and/or nails "did".

If you go to the barber shop and come out with a fresh cut, a new tracksuit and a bootleg movie

If you think tupac is still alive

If you're constantly late for no reason

If you refer to shrimp as "shrimps"

If you say "pissgettis" instead of spaghetti

If you wear colored contacts

If you point at things with your lips

If you pee in the shower

If you don't own oven mitts and use a towel instead

If you use kleenex instead of toilet paper

If you don't know the difference between your and you're

If you wear your sleep cap during sex

If you know your watch doesn't work yet you still wear it

If you have misspelled your child's name in the past

If you bring your own snacks to the movies

If you get distracted by shiny things

If you use dishsoap as bubble bath

If you think elvis is still alive

If your chicken/beef/pork bone has no more meat yet you still continue to suck/chew it

If your butter/margarine container has crumbs in it

If you use bed sheets as curtains

If you think people believe you grew a 12 inches of hair overnight

If your idea of washing your car is leaving it out in the rain

If you use ketchup on anything else other than fries/onion rings/burgers/hot dogs

If you lose 1 hubcap but still keep the remaining 3 on your car

If you have a cracked windshield that you don't plan on fixing

If the bottoms of your feet looks like you've been dancing in flour

If your cell phone is so old that a calculator gets a stronger signal

To be continued...

Frank Breaker

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