Worst idea of life contender

Heres a new contender for the "worst idea of life". Theyre called "winkers". Seriously?! How much time did the creator spend looking at bottoms before he came up with this shit idea? Can you imagine what his business plan was like?! Biz pointed out that theres a "patent pending" on the clip. Patent pending?! On drawing talking ducks and eyes on ass cheeks? Did this dude actually think that his idea was so hot someone would want to steal it? I wonder how the patent application went haha

"Patent submission - standard pair of pants with various artwork drawn on the buttock area. The purpose of this invention is to attract an individual/groups gaze via the artworks (ex: eyeballs, duck mouths, etc...). As the wearer walks/runs, an alternating fold is formed under each buttock. Through the repetition of walking the artwork will appear to be animated..."

For christ sake a patent costs several thousands of dollars. I hope this guy goes bankrupt.



Frank Breaker

Jazzle your vag

Vajazzling

Vaginal adornment?! I heard about this a little while ago and thought it was a joke. Its real and Im convinced a lot of chicks are going to add this experience to their goddamn bucket lists. Apparently the procedure costs $50.00 + at a spa... Eff that if it becomes popular enough maybe Ill just open a vajazzle shop in my garage. My price would be $9.99 - using quality rhinestones and my glue gun Ill clitter up your c section scar so nicely youll be the envy of every hooker in the trailer park. Hmm... might do a little penazzling myself but instead of bling Ill use sharks teeth.

Come on! Bling for your bojingo?! This is the worst idea of life. We over here at the Artificial Vagina ({}) know a little about ladies parts and promise you that if you get this itll just look like you have shiny crabs

Frank Breaker