Thursday, April 25, 2013

Ask Frank

Hey Frank - How can I tell what gender my parrot is?

Dear Penny,
Take it out to dinner and pay attention to which bathroom it uses.

Hey Frank - Do atheists fear God?

Dear Jackie,
Do christians fear Zeus ?

Hey Frank - Background for the movie the matrix?

Dear Martine,
That's almost a question...

Hey Frank - My parents are always making stuff up. Yesterday we had "the talk" about sex and they told me I can get pregnant even if I'm on top. Bullshit right? What should I do?

Dear Alex,
I think you should tell your parents you're adopted.

Hey Frank - If you could be a girl for a day what would you do?

Dear Lisa,
First thing I would get on my knees and pray I don't get my period that day.

Hey Frank - Why do girls have shiny lips and men dont? If you look at their lips in the light they reflect like a mirror!!!!!!!!

Dear Jerome,
It's because lips turn smooth after so many blowjays.

Hey Frank - Why do they put seeds in grapes

Dear Anonymous,
Who is they???

Hey Frank - How do I stop moaning during sex? My boyfriend says I'm really loud and I don't want his roomates to hear.

Dear Kelly, 
Tell your boyfriend to tightly hold a pillow over your face. Tell him to keep it there and he shouldn't worry if you start to struggle - its just the moans trying to escape your body.

Hey Frank - Why don't we see bats during the day?

Dear Bill
The reason why we don't see them during the day is because technically bats are werepigeons. You never see a bat and a pigeon at the same time do you?
Source(s) X-Files. 

Hey Frank - Ive been reading your posts and I wonder - are you ignorant or just apathetic?

Dear Janet,
I dont know and I dont care.

Hey Frank - Does Barack Obama fart?

Dear Jimmy, 
Yes he does and they smell like hope.

Hey Frank - Does gin really kill insects?

Dear Beth, 
Yes because it eventually destroys their small livers. It also prevents them from holding down steady jobs and wrecks their families.

Hey Frank - My tv wont turn off! Ive pushed the on/off button hundreds of times and even unplugged it. What do I do?

Dear Joe, 
The only way to stop it is to kill it. Get a pistol and shoot it.

Hey Frank - What are the little bumps on a girls nipples?

Dear Dave, 
They are an instruction manual in braille for blind people detailing secrets on how to truly pleasure a woman.

Hey Frank - I'm scared of going down on a woman. Is pussy juice bad for you?

Dear Mathew, 
Studies show that a teaspoon of PJ per day can potentially extend your life by 2 years.

Hey Frank - Whats a good nickname for the name Ruby there are no nicknames can you think of one?

Dear Ruby,
Marge is a good nickname for Ruby.

Hey Frank - Can you lose your virginity if you fall?

Dear Katherine,
Not unless you fall on a  penis.

Hey Frank - If the universe was created by the big bang what was there before? 

Dear Walt,
The big blowjay.

Hey Frank - Is it true Michael Jackson was in a band back in the day?

Dear James,
Yes. He was in a band called the Jackson 5. I don't think they were very popular though... in fact I doubt they even made it out of their parents basement. 

Frank Breaker

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